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Simon满分小作文详解15【雅思考官Simon满分作文传送门系列】

Simon是英国曼彻斯特的前雅思考官,由于创办雅思考试学习网站而在全世界的考生中越来越有名气。其网站上提供大量关于复习雅思的技巧以及颠覆性的建议,甚至还有不少Simon本人亲笔写的满分作文。这些满分作文由于出自英国考官之手,非常地道,言简意赅,和中国考生惯用的千篇一律的模板作文相比,着实让人眼前一亮。小站的Phoebe老师深感有义务要让孩子们接触到真正可以提分的好作文,所以以后会频繁地帮大家整理并总结这些满分作文的精华,相信大家都可以扔掉模板,写出高分作文!

今天来看一篇小作文---Table。题目如下:

The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002.

Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002

之前我们在讲大作文的时候,有跟大家讲过,Simon看到作文题目的时候,他的思考过程是什么样的。

Today I'm going to explain my thinking process when I answer an IELTS Writing Task 1 question. We'll use this question (Cambridge IELTS 7, page 30).This is what I'm thinking(今天就来讲一下写小作文之前的思考过程,以上面的一道题目为例):

1. I know that I can write a short introduction by paraphrasing the question.(我知道我能通过复述题目写出一个简短的introduction)

2. I look for an overall trend. I can see that the food/drinks/tobacco category has the highest percentages, and leisure/education has the lowest.(我找寻整体趋势,能看出food/drinks/tobacco类别占最高比例,leisure/education占最低比例)

3. Now I want to write two main body paragraphs. I need to select something to say about each country. Remember, there is no rule about what information you select; everyone will do this differently.(现在我想写两个主体段。我需要选择一些关于每个国家的信息来写。记住,没有规定你要选哪些信息,每个人写出来都是不同的)

4. I look for the highest figures in each category: I can see that Turkey has the highest figure for food/drinks/tobacco AND for education/leisure. Italy has the highest figure for clothing/footwear.(我在每个类别里找到最高比例的数字:我能看出Turkey在food/drinks/tobacco和education/leisure类别比例都是最高的。Italy在clothing/footwear是最低的)

5. So, I'll write a paragraph about Turkey and Italy.(因此我用一个段落来写Turkey和Italy)

6. My final paragraph needs to talk about Ireland, Spain and Sweden.(我最后一段需要描写Ireland, Spain and Sweden)

7. Maybe I'll point out that Ireland has a high figure for the first category, Spain has the lowest figure for education/leisure, and Sweden has the lowest figures for the first AND second categories.(可能我会指出Ireland在第一个类别有着最高比重,Spain在education/leisure有着最低比重,Sweden在第一第二类别都是最低)

8. I don't need a conclusion because I have already mentioned a general trend in point 2.(我不需要结尾因为我已经在第2段中写了整体趋势)

接下来大家按照Simon的指示,来写一下这篇作文。写好和范文做比较。

完整范文:

The table shows percentages of consumer expenditure for three categories of products and services in five countries in 2002.

It is clear that the largest proportion of consumer spending in each country went on food, drinks and tobacco. On the other hand, the leisure/education category has the lowest percentages in the table.

Out of the five countries, consumer spending on food, drinks and tobacco was noticeably higher in Turkey, at 32.14%, and Ireland, at nearly 29%. The proportion of spending on leisure and education was also highest in Turkey, at 4.35%, while expenditure on clothing and footwear was significantly higher in Italy, at 9%, than in any of the other countries.

It can be seen that Sweden had the lowest percentages of national consumer expenditure for food/drinks/tobacco and for clothing/footwear, at nearly 16% and just over 5% respectively. Spain had slightly higher figures for these categories, but the lowest figure for leisure/education, at only 1.98%.

今天先到这儿,下期见!

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